The Lyrics Of The MASH Theme Song Would Surprise You

Altman was looking for a specific, quirky song to fit the scene in which the character Captain Walter "Painless" Pole decides to kill himself after being mortified by a sexual situation in which he was not up to par. He wanted something funny and tragic, and turned to his friend, Johnny Mandel, a songwriter, for help (via Neatorama). In an interview with Jazzwax, Mandel said that Altman had two requests for the song: it needed to be titled "Suicide is Painless," and it needed to be the "stupidest song ever written."

Mandel thought that many would think that writing a stupid song would be easy. But after two days of trying to come up with something, he gave up, per Jazzwax. He presented Altman with music, but no acceptable lyrics. Altman then tried his hand at coming up with some lyrics, and he, too, realized that such a task is more difficult than it seems. While two grown men might have failed at coming up with foolish lyrics, Altman knew just where to turn for such an odd request.

If you or anyone you know is having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline​ at​ 1-800-273-TALK (8255)​.

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